This past Saturday, I spent a couple of hours sitting outside my apartment building, selling old DVDs. It was a beautiful sunny day with the perfect amount of sun, shade, light breezes… and friends.
A friend of mine, Jonn, who is also my landlord, sat with me for a while. I’m pretty shy and appreciated his company when strangers passed by. It felt awkward watching them pick through my things, wondering if they felt as strange as I did about me watching them.
Jonn is one of those real friendly types, and I watched and listened enviously as he greeted everyone that passed. One particular couple responded quite favourably to his greeting and I said to him jokingly, “Gee, you know them too?”
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July 1, 2008 at 8:01 am
Barbara Swafford
Hi Davina,
Some people have that “gift of gab” don’t they?
When I have our annual garage sale, a friend helps me and she’s just like your friend Jonn, bubbly and outgoing. I’m more like you, watching the people pick up and examine my “stuff”, and wondering….
July 1, 2008 at 4:15 pm
davinahaisell
Hi Barbara.
Isn’t it interesting that we attract opposites as friends? About 95% of my friends are chatty and that is just fine with me, cause I’m a good listener.
July 1, 2008 at 5:08 pm
vered
I don’t say hi… but I smile.
They almost always smile back.
July 2, 2008 at 4:38 am
davinahaisell
Hi Vered.
Smiles are good too.
July 2, 2008 at 2:22 pm
Hyrcan
A kind word is an amazing thing. It’s a simple thing really, and it makes me sad that in today’s world it one of the hardest things for people to do it seems.
Though it’s always refreshing when I stumble across people who try to share these simple things.
Oh, and I always feel weird when I go to a yard/garage sale… I’m not sure why. Re-use is so much cooler than tossing something out or buying something new.
July 2, 2008 at 3:12 pm
Chase March
Hello!
The only time it actually feels right to say hello to people is when I pass by them on a walking trail. If I am walking or running, I will say hi.
But if I am just out and about in my daily life in the big city, I would rather keep to myself. I don’t know why this is.
I have stayed in small towns before where everyone says hi to each other all the time. You get to know people that way too. Unfortunately, this isn’t practical in the big city. At least it doesn’t feel like it is.
July 2, 2008 at 4:09 pm
Cath Lawson
Hi Davina – Interesting question. I live in the country, so if I’m taking a walk and I pass someone I don’t know, I say Hi. But I wouldn’t say Hi to everyone I passed in the street – too many people.
The guy who told your friend to F off obviously didn’t think it was a good morning.
July 2, 2008 at 5:07 pm
Jennifer
I like to look at people and smile with a smile that says, “Hey, you’re important.” Sometimes words aren’t necessary, but often I greet others with a “Hi, how are you doing.”
July 2, 2008 at 6:08 pm
thelanceman
I always enjoy when someone says “hi” to me. And I do try to do it, but usually only when there are tons of people around. When I go home to visit my parent in rural Wisconsin, it’s always interesting that everyone waves when they go by. I think that one of the lures of small towns – the friendliness of people. Just the other day I had the friendliest attendant at the gas station I visit – and I left feeling really good – it’s always a positive for me when a “stranger” takes the time to acknowledge me.
July 2, 2008 at 11:02 pm
davinahaisell
Hi everyone. It’s so nice to read all your comments!
Hyrcan – Yes, it seems that the simple things in life that can make such a big difference are so easily overlooked.
Chase – You know, you’re right…. it does make a difference what you are doing and where you are going. I don’t tend to say hi to people if I’m roaring down a busy sidewalk. I just wanna get where I have to go, finish what I have to do, and get out of the crowds.
Cath – I’m jealous that you live in the country. I can’t imagine saying hi to everyone I meet on the street. And can you imagine how weird it would be if everyone you passed said hi? It sure would feel strange
Jennifer – It is true that words aren’t always necessary. Sometimes eye contact and a smile is just fine.
Lance – Yes, I remember living in the country and how everyone waves when they go by. I like when people say hi to me cause usually I’m deep in thought and I appreciate them bringing me back to the moment.
July 3, 2008 at 8:59 pm
Urban Panther
I have two responses..one to garage sales and one to saying hi. I can’t host a garage sale. I just can’t seem to be comfortable with the thought of people looking at the stuff I no longer want. What if they are thinking “Good heavens, who would own this?”, or my greater fear is, what if they actually want to buy it and they start to barter! I don’t do bartering. Car salesmen can smell me coming for miles around. Fortunately, I now have an agent. The Urbane Lion loves to barter! I just sit there, uncomfortably mind you, while he haggles away. Heck, not only did he get a good deal on the car I just bought, he got two travel mugs thrown in for good meausure *smile*.
Okay, saying hi to strangers. Yes I do. Absolutely. IF I can make eye contact with them which doesn’t always happen. And I always get at least a smile, if not a hello back. It does seem to be environment dependant. My brother would play a wicked game when he lived in Toronto. He would sit and give people cheery smiles and a big wave just to watch their reactions. Most were horrified. Some even changed seats. Now he lives in Spain. Everyone says hello to everyone.
July 3, 2008 at 11:57 pm
Dr.Cason
Drinking milk with the goats- Love it!
People here (On Guam) say hi all the time. and wave too. I was really taken aback at first but then I found I really enjoyed it. Feels really good!
July 4, 2008 at 12:04 am
Davina
Hi Urban Panther.
I don’t barter well either. And car salesmen… I stay away… I have never owned a car in my life, and so far I can still get by without one. I hope I can continue to avoid those guys… sorry all you car salesmen out there!
I’m better at making eye contact than I used to. Of course, nowadays saying hi isn’t always an option with so many people wearing headsets.
I bet your brother could tell a few funny stories. It’s fun to watch people on the subway or buses, and how they relate to one another. Again, depending on what mood you’re in, a good pair of headsets can always come in handy.
July 4, 2008 at 12:15 am
davinahaisell
Dr. Cason, hello.
I still drink goat’s milk too, after all these years — ha, ha. Guam sounds like a friendly spot… with especially beautiful trees…
For anyone who is curious about the goat’s milk note… see my comment on Barbara’s July 3rd post on Blogging Without a Blog; MMM – Can She Talk?
July 4, 2008 at 6:00 am
Linda Abbit
Hi Davina,
I almost always smile at others, and at times I’ll say hello, too.
Sometimes I’ll even comment and join in on a conversation I hear around me — like in line at the grocery store when we’re actually spending more than just a fleeting moment in passing. I know sometimes people think it’s weird, but so what?!
I’ve become more outgoing as I’ve gotten older. I was much quieter and more of an observer when I was younger. Now I think, we’re only here once and who knows how we may affect another person with just a smile or a kind word?
Smiles to you all
July 4, 2008 at 4:51 pm
davinahaisell
Hi Linda.
Yes, I quite enjoy those spontaneous chit-chats in the grocery lines; the humours ones that is. If someone is complaining or grumpy, then I can’t wait to get outta there!
July 19, 2008 at 10:16 am
Ricardo Bueno
I’m one of those types that nods with a smile and/or says “hello” to just about everyone and anyone. And heck, if you’re sellin’ dvd’s, I’m buying so I can add to the collection!
July 19, 2008 at 10:19 am
Ricardo Bueno
PS. Here’s what I didn’t say, … There’s something about smiling and saying “hi” to someone that brings just a tad bit of joy to your life. Of course not everyone welcomes your gesture with open arms; some people think you’re just flat out crazy and/or are annoyed that you would bother to speak or look in their direction. But it’s the ones that acknowledge your gesture and smile back, if even just slightly, that brings just a tad bit of happiness. Just an observation from a guy who has an optimistic outlook on life…
July 19, 2008 at 5:36 pm
davinahaisell
Hi there Ricardo. Great to see you here! Your PS is right on. I’m afraid to say hi incase someone thinks I’m a nut. But when I do and they smile back there is a spark that feels a little like Christmas morning.