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Introducing a New Blog: Shades Of Crimson.

After six months, I’m moving to a self-hosted blog and changing the name to Shades of Crimson.

This has been an interesting transition. I have spent two months dealing with technical difficulties. During that time WordPress released three updates. I changed the tag line a half dozen times, spent hours sourcing images and got into a rather uncomfortable discussion in an online support forum.

I’m sure my face turned a few shades of crimson. I’m not always under the influence of a “loving pulse”.

But, as Lance from The Jungle of Life commented on my last post: “I think we all have a little dysfunction! I’m going to embrace that dysfunction this year.”

Taking the Personal out of Personal Development

It’s been said that dysfunction is an illusion designed by the inner critic, who takes things personally. It does a good job at holding a person in a place of judgment and causing them to react defensively. In my experience I’ve fallen into the trap of defining myself based on the inner critic’s direction.

We give too much credit to the inner critic. If it’s an illusion, how can it design anything? Think about that. Which makes me wonder about spirit too. In my humble opinion spirit exists, although I can’t see it any more clearly than I can see the inner critic. Both of these exist as beliefs for me because of experience, and how I have perceived that experience.

Anyway, when those nasty inner voices cloud our vision we are confused because it goes against what we are made of (whatever that is). Our natural instinct for truth and balance runs deep and the inner critic can be convincing. If a person is sensitive this can easily throw them off track.  An internal struggle ensues because their perception of how things are happening doesn’t resonate with their instincts.

This year, I’m inspired to practice experience without expectation. To notice. Some days I will succeed, some days I will fail – two sides of the same coin. But, getting up in the morning to focus on experience rather than accomplishment sheds new light on things. I feel lighter starting the day this way.

Life illustrates different shades of crimson for people. Whether we are enthusiastically inspired by our experience – resonance, or feeling resistant and judgmental – dissonance.

There is only one outcome we can count on in life. What lies between now and then is experience – the ultimate accomplishment.

I continue to be inspired by the blogs I read and the comments that are shared here. Thanks for a conversational 2008. I appreciate the time each and every one of you take to read and comment because the blogosphere is certainly a busy place.

These bloggers have stepped up to share advice and offer support over the last few months and I want to thank you here and now. I’m eternally grateful to all of you.

Catherine – Cath Lawson Blog

Robin – Let’s Live Forever

Vered – MomGrind

Evelyn – Attraction Mind Map

Stacey – Create A Balance

Monika – Freelance Writing

Sara – Sara Healy

Patricia – Patricia’s Wisdom

Kathy – Virtual Impax

And I must add Barbara to this list from Blogging Without A Blog. Six months ago I learned how to add a gravatar to Loving Pulse, but for the life of me I couldn’t remember how to do it for the new blog. I did a couple of quick searches online and didn’t get the fast information I wanted. So, it was over to her blog where I had it all figured out in 5 minutes. Thanks Barbara!

M

Project Announcement — The Quote Effect: A Blogger’s Online Collection

What type of blogger are you? Inspirational? Sarcastic? Humourous? Professional? Let’s put our heads together and get ready for some creative fun!

Join me at Shades Of Crimson to find out more about this project. While Loving Pulse will stay put, comments are closed on this post.

M

If this is your first time visiting Loving Pulse and you enjoyed the reading, please join me over at Shades Of Crimson. Subscribe to the feed and you won’t miss upcoming posts. All new comments will go into moderation.

And please, bear with me. I’m new to the whole world of self-hosted blogs and not a computer geek. There may be the odd glitch as I get things up and running and have a few design elements customized. If you have any problems commenting or navigating please let me know; visit the Contact page.

Image entitled Happiness, photographed by Branko Korelc; property of Dreamstime.com. Used here with permission. Illegal download and usage not allowed.
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I went for a walk.

It was a beautiful day. The sun was poised in the western sky at that point right before sinking towards sunset; that brief and silent pause before changing direction.

Stepping in rhythm to the song on my mp3 player, I set the pace for another good power walk.

Five minutes later I was rudely cut off by a driver who was either in a bad mood or who simply refused to give pedestrians the right of way. I swore under my breath and scowled at him. This got me to thinking about other situations and people I’d come across that annoyed me.

I walked and wandered further, reflecting on this intrusion into my thoughts. I wandered past remembering these times to remembering how my reaction whether expressed or not, had bothered me.

I had regretted allowing myself to be caught off guard; for not “walking my talk”.

More walking. I remembered how after letting go of judgment and of what had annoyed me, I was able to see how differently the situation could have been handled.

I reminded myself that my path would most likely come across more idiots and obstacles. By expecting them I would be less likely to react.

With this, I felt less vulnerable. The power walk was back on.

I’ve always believed in the power of positive thinking. But isn’t it true that dwelling only on the positive doesn’t necessarily mean your life will always be rosy? Life happens and we never know why some experiences come across our paths. Some things can’t be controlled, but attitude certainly can be.

Wearing rose-coloured glasses doesn’t help anyone. Through meditation, I’ve focused on the positive and tried to ignore the negative. But the fact remains that it is there in many different forms and you can’t walk away from it.

When you simply notice negativity, in yourself and in others, you are not inviting it in. By noticing it and not judging it, you put yourself in the position to shift its path and let it go.

Noticing doesn’t mean you have to accept or put up with the situation. But, it can give you a moment to make up your mind how and if you will handle it.

Noticing keeps you flexible. It gives life a chance to flow as it needs to.

It takes practice though. But don’t worry…

There will be traffic delays.
You may be put on hold for too many minutes.
Sometimes you’ll wait in long lines.
People make mistakes.
You might miss the bus.

Just a few examples.

Is there a particular situation where you remember not having responded the way you would have liked to?

Please share your comments below. If you enjoyed this article don’t forget to subscribe to my feed.

Photo Credit: Prony

I thought this was a nice t-shirt when I bought it.

I believe in living as a free spirit so this was the perfect T.

A free spirit has been defined as a person who lives by their wishes and beliefs and who is unconstrained by society’s rules.

My definition of a free spirit is someone who is powerful, happy and free. Someone who embodies the spiritual, who is full of love and all that colourful loveliness of being alive. Oh, la-di-da!

Pollyanna step aside.

I’ve been kidding myself. I have only dreamed about being a free spirit.

I aspire to live unconstrained by society’s conventions because I want to hide in my safe little box. I’m afraid (no, I BELIEVE) I’m not good enough to belong anywhere!

This is a pattern I’ve lived with for most of my life, and I’ve kept my spirit contained because of it. Sad!

In grade seven I was ostracized by a group of girls. We would stand in a circle at recess and talk. Well, most of us talked. I just listened. I was very shy, afraid to talk and afraid to be seen.

One day, one of the girls approached me and told me they didn’t want me hanging around with them anymore. I was devastated and spent the next five years in school looking for some sign that anyone might like me, that I belonged and that someone wanted to be my friend. I wanted an invitation.

I suffered in silence. The only person I spoke to about this was my mother, and that was only because she saw me running from the school bus one afternoon in tears. I ran straight to my room and she followed.

“Nobody likes me,” I sobbed in answer to her concerned inquiry. I can’t remember what her response was. I just remember sobbing uncontrollably and she eventually left without a word.

I went to therapy to heal this wound but the pain never went away. Why? I kept making those girls responsible for my pain. A part of me still wanted to believe they were insensitive cruel bitches (that felt good!), but I know now as an adult that kids will be kids.

The reality was that I was already in pain before being ostracized. I believed then that I didn’t belong and I didn’t have anything to offer. That was why I stood in silence in that circle during recess. In a sense I was using them to keep up an appearance. Why shouldn’t they kick me out? I was their weakest link.

What happened was only a reflection of my belief system. Thinking back, I didn’t dispute this with those girls. I accepted that there was something wrong with me and continued to live my life in a box, afraid to be seen.

So how can I free my spirit?

Somehow I don’t think that ripping this t-shirt off while walking along a busy downtown sidewalk is the answer.

I’m still learning that living as a free spirit doesn’t require an invitation from anyone but myself. It needs to be exercised and that will not happen while living in a box. And, there is no la-di-da here either.

These are 10 actions I believe will exercise the spirit into remembering the freedom that is its birthright.

  • Take the self and everyone else less seriously.
  • Make rules and then break them.
  • Make lots of mistakes; laugh at and learn from them.
  • Stop trying to have everyone else conform to my rules.
  • Give other people permission to be themselves and make their own mistakes.
  • Respond, don’t react.
  • Let creativity speak and listen to it; practice what inspires you because that strengthens the spirit.
  • Get out of the head and follow the heart more; practice to learn the difference.
  • Envision myself as already living as a free spirit.
  • Take my place in the circle; recognize that I have gifts to share and just share them!

I will leave you with this quote that a friend shared with me just today. “Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.”

As for that box I mentioned, are you in or out? How has this affected your life?

Please share your comments below and if you enjoyed this article don’t forget to subscribe to my feed. My next post is entitled “Creative Luny Landing in the Sand”.

Photo Credit: Davina Haisell

If you are a new visitor to Loving Pulse, welcome and thanks for stopping by!

And, hi to all you regular readers. I have appreciated your comments and support over the past few months.

A big thanks to Barbara at Blogging Without A Blog for choosing Loving Pulse as New Blog of the Week (NBOTW). I am, as the title of this post suggests, “Over The Moon”.

When I started posting in June, Barbara was the first to leave a comment and she has continued to visit and comment since then. 

I had no idea how much time was involved when I first started this practice but thankfully, I have learned a lot from Blogging Without A Blog. Barbara shares helpful tips and information to make blogging easier for all of us. If you are a new blogger, spend some time reading through her archives.

I have connected with a huge number of other bloggers who read and comment on Barbara’s blog, and learned from many of them too.

At Loving Pulse I write about what moves me. Like the moon, we all have a dark side and a sunny side. I explore this through my own experience with the hopes of inspiring readers to do the same for themselves.

My most recent article entitled Stepping Out Of These Old Shoes is about facing, or not facing changes in life.

My upcoming article to be posted this Friday is entitled Free Spirit My Ass!

Feel free to visit my Favourite Posts page where I have showcased some of my favourites.

I will sign off now with a quote from Les Brown.

“Shoot for the moon and if you miss you will still be among the stars.”

 

Please share your comments below and if you don’t want to miss my upcoming posts, don’t forget to subscribe to my feed.

Photo Credit: Davina Haisell

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